Category Archives: Training

Home Sweet Home

The trip home was relatively uneventful.  We had a couple of challenges along the way home – namely the motor for the wipers finally died and we had to pull over during a sudden downpour right on the boarder of Pennsylvania and Ohio – but otherwise, the only annoying thing is that it was a long trip.  The dogs held up well and napped most of the way home.

We had such a wonderful trip in both Portsmouth and Washington D.C.  The dogs received lots of compliments on their behavior because they stayed when we set them up for photos in Washington or at various scenic stops along the way.  They loved every moment of the attention and lapped it up in typical pit bull fashion.

Work calls to start back up tomorrow.  While I’m not looking forward to it, it will be good to get back to being industrious.  Between work and planning our wedding reception (July 21st), we’ll be very busy these next few weeks and the vacation gave us a respite from the normal hustle and bustle of our day to day lives.

I’m hoping the weather cools off here soon as the temperatures in the high 90s and 100s are not conducive to training the dogs and they are sorely missing the structure and mental stimulation we get from training.  It’s been rather annoying dealing with four very high drive dogs and no actual direction for them to go because of the sheer heat and concern for their safety.  Ah, well…we’ll get back into the groove again.

Here are a few pictures from our trip.  You can enjoy the rest here.

Mika, Luna and Ryker at the Washington Monument

Lincoln Monument in Washington D.C.

The unbelievable temperatures in our travels.

My Why of Pit Bull Ownership and The Pit Bull Problem

I often get asked a ton of questions when people find out I own pit bulls.  The questions typically range from “Oh, my God!  You own baby killers?  Aren’t you afraid they will hurt your kids?” to “Oh, how awesome!  Do you breed and can I get one of your puppies?”.  (Truth be told, I absolutely hate both of those example questions, but I get them both all too frequently!)

I filter through the questions now like a pro.  I almost have to at this point since Luna will be nine years old in a few short weeks.  I stay honest and try to keep my answers to the point and void of emotion.  Why do I do that? Well, let’s face it…we all love our dogs, but people who own pit bulls need to realize that the breed has developed a bit of a problem because of its popularity and because of that popularity there and the problems associated with it, there are people who abhor the breed with a passion.  There are far too many hands in the cookie jar when it comes to these dogs – breeder, rescuer, and pet owner…we all play a part in the problem and we need to play a part in the solution.

The question that I get asked the most is one that still makes me think long and hard on an answer for.  Well, I’ll start with the tale of the first time I was asked the infamous question, “Why did you pick the pit bull as your breed of choice?”

We were at the Novi Pet Expo and Ryker was just a youngster at the time.  We’d gotten him one of the silly clown collars to wear to keep him occupied trying to capture and also to look bloody cute.  He succeeded at the latter, but not so much the former.  While he was busy rolling around on the ground and looking like a nerd we had woman came up to our booth and looked over the pseudo barriers at the silly looking puppy rolling around on the floor.  She had scars all over her arms and a couple on her face and she was apprehensive near the dogs.

She asked me that fateful question after relaxing a bit realizing neither Luna nor Ryker had even the slightest bit of bad body language toward her.  I don’t remember exactly how I answered her in a way that made her feel comfortable telling me she had been attacked by one nearly three years prior by a dog that looked similar to the wiggling, brindle idiot on the floor next to me.  It made me sad and angry knowing these facts – going through all of that by a breed I love and cherish.  This woman, through all of this, didn’t hate the breed.  She blamed the dog that did it and the owner…not the breed as a whole.  She was still rightfully scared of them but not so much that she asked to pet Ryker who willingly threw himself at her and presented his belly.

It was truly an eye opener that despite all of the bad examples showing up in the newspaper nearly every single day that there is still reason to work to salvation the breed’s reputation.  Now, to get back on the topic since I rambled off a bit.  Why did I pick the pit bull as my breed of choice?

To this day, I can honestly say that I never pictured myself owning the breed.  They weren’t even on my radar.

I saw myself owning a Malamute or a Siberian Husky truthfully.  Those two breeds reminded me of wolves and the closer to my favorite totem animal and I drooled over having one.  I realized that I was absolutely out of my mind after doing research on both breeds that neither was suited for me or my lifestyle.

My first on-my-own, real experience with a pit bull in my adult life made me fall head over heels for the breed.  Angel was a deaf, solid white girl with bright green eyes.  She needed a place to rest and heal before being placed and I was apparently the ‘perfect’ place.  I didn’t know she was a pit bull at first and once I found out I was enthralled and, admittedly, a little scared at the time.  She wasn’t with me long but I knew at that time I found my breed.  The stability, the temperament, the energy level, the avenues I could pursue with them was endless like my imagination.  I couldn’t stop thinking of all the things I could do with my very own pit bull.

Sure, I knew the horror stories about the baby killers and people maulers.  I also knew the realities in the breed. These dogs are NOT for everyone and they have their flaws – like the fact that a good portion of these dogs do not prefer the company of other canines or small and fuzzy creatures.  Let’s face the facts – these dogs ultimately became the best dog-on-dog combat animals bred by man, but that same selective breeding allowed for human stability unmatched – when properly selected FOR that temperament.

That being said, there are far too many people that I see and hear about with these dogs that makes me want to cringe.  They don’t deserve these dogs.  Only about 60% of those who own, breed or rescue these dogs need to be doing that in my opinion.  That number may be higher or lower, but far too many people get these dogs as an ego extension and don’t realize the hard work that goes into making a good bully breed ambassador.

There is far too much greed in breeders (not all, but many). Sadly, it isn’t just the BYBs trying to make a living.  Some ‘responsible’ and well known breeders have fallen off the wagon by producing too many or subpar dogs.  They have put aside health testing or even titling their dogs.  It’s a shame really because people should look at the ethics of a responsible breeder and know they truly want to improve and help the breed and not just keep reproducing the same crap over and over again.

Many rescuers are just as guilty as the breeders they abhor.  I’m sure everyone has heard the same mantra:  ‘Don’t Breed or Buy While Shelter Animals Die’.  The want to believe that the ‘No Kill’ philosophy means saving every animal that graces their doors.  The reality is so much more different that it’s sad.

Since the ‘No Kill’ philosophy is based on saving animals that are adoptable dogs that are shy, fearful, aggressive toward people or children, unmanaged aggression toward other animals (the kind of unmanaged that may mean a re-direct or inability to change the dog’s direction through focusing on something other than the other animal/dog) shouldn’t be on the list considered adoptable – especially with pit bulls and their mixes.
Many rescuers see a sad face and want to save the animal, but the reality is that if it isn’t safe, is scared to death of the world around it (which may likely mean a fear biter) or too sick to treat, the kindest option is humane euthanization.  It sucks, but rescuers are the cleanup crew for the stupid pet owners and of the world and they need to be strong and save only the best knowing that stable dog may die if they save the dog cowering in the back of the kennel.

Pet owners are the final problem and in many cases, the biggest one.  Far too many people go out and get a dog and don’t research the breed and this isn’t any different for new pit bull owners.  They go to the pound a local rescue group or even a breeder and expect this magical creature that they’ve been told about only to learn that there is a lot of work that goes into these dogs – training, socialization, exercise, etc. – and more often than not, it causes new owners to get into a bit of trouble for their lack of research (or sometimes media reaching trouble if they didn’t pick out a stable dog).

This isn’t to say that there aren’t pet owners who don’t do a ton of research and many who do some research but learn and continue to grow over time (I can name a good many I know who continue to learn and grow even after minimal research), however the alarming number of media stories happening because of a ‘pit bull attack’ needs to stop and until people face the realization that the pit bull might not be for them then we’ll continue to have this issue.

I am no expert in the breed and I’m continually learning, reading and schooling myself to better the lives of my dogs, however I ultimately chose this breed because I wanted a dog that could do everything (and researched, and researched…and researched some more) – a phenomenal sport dog and family companion.  I’ve succeeded with the dogs I have now and gone above and beyond my expectations and work to set new goals and tasks to keep their minds busy and me learning new things and couldn’t ask for a better breed for my lifestyle and what I want to accomplish in life.

Pit Bulls: Service Dog Super Star?

Public Service Announcement [to all who think I’m hating on these dogs or those who hate these dogs]: I am pro-APBT, but I am also pro-reality and pro-responsibility.  I am all for promoting these dogs in a positive light, but unfortunately, there are individuals who are doing more damage than good even with their angelic intentions.

There has been an incredible rise in the popularity of pit bull-type dogs as service animals for individuals with physical or mental impairments.  The rise has been so drastic that it has caught the attention of anti-bully breed aficionados as well.  Is this rise in popularity for the good and betterment of the breed?  Personally, I’m really for it and I own and utilize an APBT for this very purpose and have done so for nearly seven years now (not a very common fact to many people unless they know me personally as I’m not always keen on talking about it).

The APBT and other cross breeds and commonly labeled ‘pit bull’ breeds are in a league of their own.  They are loyal, hard working dogs.  They have all of the qualities and then some that would make them phenomenal service dogs for a variety of uses.  They do, however, have their downfalls.  It is, unfortunately, one of the biggest things that pro-APBT service dog people would rather be swept under the carpet to continue to promote this breed.

Now, I’m not saying that these downfalls lessen the ability of these dogs to do work, but it requires that the person searching for the dog in question be realistic in realizing that breed traits may not always surface until the dog is well on the way to being trained and have to ‘change careers’ and retire from being a potential service dog.  Not all dogs are meant to be service dog material and this is definitely not the exception for pit bulls either.

One of my own personal reasons for being concerned for this breed’s rise in popularity in the service dog industry is that people are using this label to escape the consequences of having a banned breed in a BSL-ridden area.  Some of these dogs aren’t being properly evaluated for the actual work being done, are being taught basic manners to respond in public and are not extensively worked specifically for servicing a disabled handler and for people to continually do this is a shame for the service dog community.  Service dogs are supposed to be held to the highest level of responsibility and having a breed that doesn’t have the most phenomenal reputation means you take that reputation and double it.

Ultimately, finding a pit bull-type dog that has all the aptitudes necessary for being a quality service animal is a rare find (and I know this from personal experience as my partner is going to be nine and we’ve finally branched out into looking at other breeds if we cannot find another pit bull-type dog).  Does it mean they’re not out there?  Absolutely not.  They could be sitting in your local shelter or be the product of a responsibly bred litter.  The main thing is, don’t get a pit bull to be a service dog because the dog ‘looks cool’ or whatever reason you want that is more ego-based than reason-based.  When looking for a service dog, get a breed that fulfills your needs for independence and quality of life.

The Fault is Mine, The Glory is Theirs

I’ve been lagging on the blog for a bit – a lot of fun (well, not so much!) has happened, but here’s another wonderful article by my GSD-owning training partner, Jen Rainey of Vom Haus Huro.

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They know not that they have earned a title. They care not for the scores. They are unimpressed by the cheers of the crowd and they remain ignorant to the scorn of those who judge them. Yet our dogs continue to try, to strive and to achieve. Why? Titles and accomplishments are not for dogs. They are for the owners and the window shoppers. What is for the dog is the time that the owner invests, the pride shared with that much beloved dog and the joy of working together.

When my dogs fail to perform a task, follow a command or pass a trial I always look to myself, to my performance, to find the fault. Did I spend enough time working with my dog? Did I form an appropriate bond? Did I work the dog repetitively with high motivation and fun? Did I myself give a performance consistent with what I present to my dog during training? The fault never fails to be mine. If we do not pass it is because I did not teach the task; because I did not present the same picture; because I failed to bring what I needed to bring to our team. As handlers it is easy to blame the dog, the venue, the crowd, that weird tuft of grass or that sunny spot that blinded us for 5 seconds. But these are not reasons, they are excuses. Excuses because we fail to admit to ourselves and to our ever forgiving canine partner that we, the “higher being” failed to do our job when the heat was on.

One could easily assume that since I look first to myself for fault that I may also look first to myself in success. The exact opposite is true. When we have success it is because of my dog. It is because my dog did his job, as he always does, and brought his half to the team. More importantly the success is his (or hers) because he suffered my repetition in training, he made the correct decision even when I asked incorrectly and he gave me his all when the time to put up or shut up was right in front of us. Because while I worry about the judge, the crowd and the performance, he worries only about working with me and experiencing the joy of teamwork.

Your dog is the only relationship that you will be in where the other participant will put your happiness first. Each and every time. Cherish that selflessness for what it is, strive to deserve it and above all try your hardest to remain ever conscious of it. None of us will ever be good enough to deserve such devotion in our lifetime but we are lucky enough to have it anyway. That in itself is a gift beyond measure. One which we owe our dogs for all of their days.

It’s Not The Dog, It’s The Owner

I’ve heard this saying and said it a million times and yet I still hear the same excuses and the same complaints – heck, I’ve said them a few times myself in frustration over my own dogs.  Having owned and trained my own personal dogs for as many years as I have and competed with them, I’d rather give them the time of day than to rush them.  Here’s to you, Ms. Rainey for another fabulous bit of authorship.  You rock!

This entry is dedicated to all of the dogs out there who are slow to go – including my own Lyric, who’s ADD goofy behavior has often driven me nuts.

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How often have we all heard that saying? How often have we all SAID that saying? I’m willing to wager it’s a fair amount for us all. I wonder, though, how many people really take into consideration what it truly means. For sure there are instances of dogs that are too damaged physically or emotionally to do a certain job or task but I have to often how often one finds oneself in such a situation. I think that in today’s world of high speed technology and “bigger, badder, better” mindsets we often lose sight of one of the greatest tricks we have in our trainer’s bags. Time. It seems like such a simple notion, doesn’t it? Time, by definition, is a common term for the experience of duration and a fundamental quantity of measuring systems. Why then, when none of us knows exactly what our personal “duration” will be are we so addicted to the notion that we must confront an experience, master it, speed through it and set another mark in the distance to aim our warp speed engines at? Simply put, we have time. A select few have managed to find joy in the journey, but what about the baby steps of just finding joy in today? in the hour? in the now?

I constantly see younger and younger dogs in the rings training, competing and then being tossed aside for the next new dog, the next better dog. My question is why? At what point did we forget that it is our time and our efforts that we put into these dogs that results in the benefits we get back out of them? We have a saying about canine nutrition (that we often also apply to breeding): garbage in, garbage out. I believe the same is true of training and time. You cannot put 5 minutes into your dog a day and expect the dog to give you the focus and working drive of a dog that is receiving 50 minutes a day. It just does not work that way.

Beyond that a dog that earns it’s UCD title at 12 months old with a score of 95 gets the exact same certificate as a dog that earns its UCD title at 5 years old with a score of 71. So why the rush? If you don’t get a “super awesome hotdog bonus wow” certificate, then why push? My personal experience is that even an extra certificate wouldn’t be worth the rush (and subsequent foundation shortcuts) but that’s a topic for another lengthy note. Enjoy your dog. You can’t guarantee that you will be here tomorrow. You can’t guarantee that your dog will be there tomorrow. But you can guarantee no regrets if you spend your time appreciating what your dog is doing (or trying to do) for you, spending your time judging your successes and not your failures and refusing the play the “I need a better dog” game. In the end, we get the dog we NEED, not always the one we thought we wanted.

What Do I Train? Dogs, Of Course!

I borrowed this from my wonderful training partner, Jen Rainey of Vom Haus Huro German Shepherds.  I really love what she had to say in it.

The question that I am most often asked is “what kind if training do you do?” to which I typically respond “dog”. I’m not being sarcastic when I give that answer (o.k. so maybe I am to an extent. lol) but I don’t believe that I subscribe to any “one” kind fo training, but more of a mish mash melting pot of methods. The way I train is my own. It’s my baby. Like any baby it is ever growing, always changing and occassionally full of surprises, both good and bad. My training theories and methods have evolved from the way way that I view dogs. I don’t think that any dog is exactly the same as another and I think that a “cookie cutter” approach to training is what leads so many dogs and their owners down a road that they would have otherwise been able to avoid.

 As humans we insist upon our individuality and our ability to be ourselves. Our own entity. Yet that very right that we so vehemently defend for ourselves is often the very first thing we strip from our dogs. Each and every dog has it’s own personality, its own strengths and weaknesses and its own potential and limitations. I believe that when we begin to work with a dog we have the choice to either try and force that dog into the predetermined mold that we envisioned for it or we can evaluate the dog for who and what it is and essentially exploit that dogs strengths to hide or reduce its weaknesses. Lying to ourselves about who or what our dogs are or about who or what we are as their trainers will only diminish the working relationship that we share with them as well as severely effect the success of our training efforts.

Once we can be honest with our dogs and ourselves we are actually in a much better position to not only experience training advancements but to also meet and surpass our original training goals. At this point I begin to focus on the two parts of training that I think promote the best results: remove the gray and be fair. I’m going to address both of this points in further detail in the next two paragraphs. If you are bored now, leave, because it’s only going to get worse. lol Anyone that knows me knows 2 things about me and training. Number one is that I win at obediene. A lot. I don’t say that to boast or brag, I say it simply as a fact. I win much more often than I don’t.  I don’t win because I’m a great trainer or even a good trainier. I win because I am fair and my dogs give their hearts every time we step onto the field because they appreciate and have confidence in that fact. Number two is that I am fiercely loyal to my training theory beause it allows me to be fair, to let the dog shine for what it is and above all, to let us enjoy the trip, the training and the victories.

Removing the gray sounds easy. Training should, after all, be black and white but it is absolutely astounding what we can do to complicate it. Sit means sit. Sounds easy enough. Sounds perfectly black and white. That’s because it is. Where we get the “gray” is when we tell our dogs “sit” and the dog instead smells the ground, looks at another dog, dances around and smiles or jumps on us. When we laugh and say “oh, ground must smell good” or “no, now is not the time for hugsies super sweetie baby doggy” or “oh, you want some attention, don’t you?” we create the gray. If you allow a behavior you agree with it and every time the dog attempts something other than sit and we reward it either by laughing it off or explaining it away, we are not doing them or ourselves any favors. We are only complicating matters and creating more gray in our black and white world. I prefer, instead to use marker words and rewards. “Yesssss!” and a reward of food or a toy for good, “nein” and a witholding of the reward for no. Once the dog knows and understands all commands then a negative reinforcer such as a collar pop will be added to the “no” to create consequence for ignored commands.

Now we come to the fairness portion, which, fortunately for me, the dogs and the sake of brevity, matches up very well with removing the gray. It is unfair of me to expect the dog to reason out that if I say sit at training, it means sit but at home it means ‘walk around for 5 more minutes and then lay over there’. It is unfair of me to only mean what I say on the trial field and it is unfair of me to rely on the use of threats and correction colllars or other training tools to bully my dog into listening while on the training field only to undo all of that by trying to reason my dog into obedience at all other times. I’m not saying I do any of these things (in fact I try not very hard not to. lol) but sadly I have seen it all done as people try to make thir way down the path of training. My dogs perform only because they know that compliance will, at all times and in all situations, result in positive things. Treats, toys, hugs, pets, whatever it takes to make that dog know that that one simple act of obedience was enough to make me the proudest owner on that field. 

My dogs are by no means robots that listen 24/7/365. They do have their off days and they also have their moments of brilliance. What I’ve found is that through removing the gray and being consistantly fair, I’ve been able to increase those brilliant moments and decrease the off days. Anytime you are rewarded for one behavior and discouraged for another it makes it easier to continue to choose the correct behavior and forget about the bad. They have joy in their work and their jobs because it has always been a source of excitement and praise and they have confidence in their work because they know they can count on me to be fair. I am not willing to accept radicial changes to my theory because I will jealously guard the resulting work ethocs that they bring to the table. My methodoloy can and will change because any time I can find a way to further narrow the gray I can and will take advantage of that, provided that that method also is grounded in fairness. I’d rather retire a dog untitled than force it joylessly into work that it has no interest or natural ability for. Right or wring it is where I stand.

So that’s my training in a nutshell. I train dogs. I train them fairly, consistantly and concisely. I train not for results, but for the joy of the work and the sake of the dog. Love it or hate it it’s the only way I can be. I won’t abuse a dog for a title. I won’t take a shortcut to get fast results. I will give that dog every advantage. I wil take every pain to help that dog understand not only the commands that we use but also the joy that can be found in following them. I’ve said many times that I have never met a person with a dog problem but I have met many a dog with a person problem. I say it because I mean it. As humans we seem to think the dog should be the smarter half of the team and reason through OUR thought processes. While it may not be true, I prefer to at least THINK that I am smarter than my dogs, and therefore present things to them in a way that they understand. Easily, effectively and happily.

Gross Weather = No Training Time

Unfortunately, my absolutely favorite place to train when the gross weather rolls in is out of commission for the month of December.  What does this mean for me and the beasts?  It means that we have to brave the sleet, the snow and the rain to get our training thing done.  This is fine for me since I can layer up and be nice and toasty, but the pit bulls believe that they will melt because they are made of sugar, spice and everything nice.  Convincing them that they simply will not die when they go out into the cold and the muck is a feat in itself.

The last few days we’ve been absolute slackers.  They’ve stayed in the nice, warm house and run on their Grand Carpet Mill and trashed the house with the massive box of goodies ranging from Wubbas to stuffies to Kongs and everything in between.  Let me tell you, getting beaten by a Mega Wubba is on my list of things I definitely do not like having repeated. (Thanks, Ryker!)

As it stands right now, I’m not going to be able to travel with my friend Jen to Kentucky in a couple of weeks to try again for Ryker’s Schutzhund BH because of the likely possibility that I’ll have to work a crap load of hours the week before Christmas.  I will be glad for the paychecks I get, but it just sucks because I wanted to go and had planned to for weeks because I think we are read – well, Ryker definitely is (my nerves suck!).

Lyric is coming around beautifully with her obedience and I’d love to start working more on it so that we can try for our URO1 in the early part of next year and possibly a UCD the following year if she’s ready.  I’m trying to keep it light and positive with her so she continues to enjoy it.  She is the kind of dog that starts loathing things if they become boring or restrictive because she is such a free-spirited dog.

Mika’s doing well and has the most phenomenal heeling for such a young dog.  We’re not really pushing her very hard because we want her to have fun and not rush things.  Being a title chaser can only be benefited if the dog enjoys what they’re doing and I can’t see the point of ruining a young dog like that for a piece of paper.  I’m very proud of Bruce for what he’s done with her and what he continues to do with her.  The bond between the two of them is amazing – especially since most of the dogs in the house prefer me and if she had to choose, it’d be him and not me she’d run to first. (Traitor!)

Luna and Duo, well, they’re just relaxing.

Luna’s enjoying the fact that she doesn’t have to constantly train and be conditioned for weight pull since I’ve retired her from pulling heavily.  We’re going to attempt UKC Rally next year, I think.  She knows all of the moves, so that won’t be a problem.  We’ll just fine tune those fronts and finishes before we go and be all set.

Duo, on the other hand, won’t be doing much of anything except snoozing with his Grandpa.  He stresses out when he leaves and his reactive behavior around other dogs leaves something to be desired.  In reality, he’d rather just hold down the bed or the couch than travel with his siblings.  The one-on-one time he gets when he stays with Grandpa, I think, is his favorite thing in the planet.  How else would he not look plumper when we return than before…because someone feeds him entirely too many goodies while we’re gone!

Ah, well…with any luck, the weather will clear and I won’t have to spend as much time complaining about the garbage weather and inability to train.  Heck, the possibilities of taking classes this winter very well may make my life a little less not busy (Ha!) and brush up on a few skills and basic behaviors and before the dogs and I know it, spring will be here again!

Training Trials and Tribulations

I’ve been training as frequently as I possibly can since Ryker and I assassinated our chances at a BH recently. He knows what he’s supposed to do and so do I, but we have had to go back and connect where we needed to when it comes down to the nitty gritty of the whole training aspect. It’s taken us a bit of time, but I think I’ve gotten it…finally.

However, things change when I switch the dog I’m working with. In this case, Lyric. She frustrates me sometimes because she is always thinking. My friend, Jen, said it best. I’ve been giving her mixed signals when I ask for something and while she wants to please me, I’m confusing her. I feel like a complete idiot in this aspect and it’s good friends that help me see that I’m flat out being stupid and that it’s not the dog…it’s me.

Lyric is, and always has been, a thinker. She’s forever analyzing a situation and trying to figure out which way will best make me proud of her. When I get frustrated, I handle myself and her horridly wrong and I feel like a jerk after the fact – especially when someone I highly respect tells me I’m being a jerk (in a more elaborate example). I just need to reassess how I handle her and I think the first thing we need to do is go back to the basics – more for me than her. To do this, we’re going to enroll in a basic obedience class.

Now, Lyric has much more knowledge than what she’ll get in the basics class, but for me to remember that I have to work my sensitive little monkey in a better fashion. She’s not like Ryker who will go, “Whatever you want, mom!” and do it in the fashion I ask. She’s also not like Mika or Luna who will do anything for that toy. She wants to please me and wants me to be happy with her and to do that, I have to change who I am with her for her.

I’m still feeling like a complete idiot from today, but knowing that I can admit to myself and to her that I screwed up makes things a whole lot better. Tink (Lyric) – I love you, even when you do some of the stupidest things you make me laugh and I promise I’ll get better when we work together. I hate seeing the doubt in your face when I get frustrated.